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Da Bears and other important distractions...

Girlfriend of Med Student

Fri Aug 12, 2005 11:31 am


This topic is totally different but my boyfriend is a medical student and we talk for like 4 minutes a night. He's in his 3rd year, stressed out, obviously, but as the days go by, we're talking less and less to each other. Granted I'm busy too, but we talk so little that it's beginning to worry me. It scares me because I can't tell if we're growing apart or if he's really JUST always studying/at the hospital and has no time to give to me. Any ideas?


Fri Aug 12, 2005 12:04 pm

how bout dinner, pick you up round 8ish :wink:

seriously though, don't take it personal. it's medical school and your 2nd and 3rd years are uber busy. things will be better during his 4th year during his electives and after he matches. personal life takes a back seat for now and he's aware of and affected by what impact his school/career has, but priority of one over the other is slight.

Fri Aug 12, 2005 2:43 pm

3rd year and internship are not easy times for couples. The divorce rate among married couples is very high during those two years in particular.

I remember (and my wife can confirm) sleeping through dates in 3rd year. We went to a party with my former co-workers - the first time my she met them - and I fell asleep on the couch.

What rotation is he on? If it's a 3-month surgery rotation, it's quite understandable. If it's psych on the wards with no call - you should have a talk with him.


Thu Aug 18, 2005 3:24 pm

hey, thanks guys. he's on medicine and he's on call, and it's only a month long. he's never worked full-time in his life so i think this is hard for him to be thrown into the thick of things. he's basically doing 7AM-7PM right now but sometimes it goes till 9PM and then he'll be on-call at night. so far they haven't required him to come in in the middle of the night but he's stressed about his exams, i guess.

he's kind of grumpy all the time and all we ever talk about is his work--was that with you too?


ps krust, i dont have a life anymore (studying for the mcat myself), i would not make the best company at this point, lol, unless you're trying to study too.

Thu Aug 18, 2005 5:41 pm

Grumpy was my middle name in 3rd year. At least it sounds like he can take call from home and goes in at a reasonable hour.

When I was on trauma service my fiancee was working the night shift at the newspaper. I'd call her at 2a near the end of her shift and she'd start to tell me about some bizarre story in the paper - and I'd tell her I know, I just did an exam on the guy. It made it easier when work overlapped a bit.

Obviously Medicine is one of the major rotations - with a lot more reading than most rotations, so more stress. Take advantage of the breaks when they come.